Caring too much what others think of you is a common experience for many. It is natural, though not always healthy, to desire validation and approval from others. When this concern becomes excessive, it can negatively impact or wellbeing and hinder our personal growth.
We are social beings, but when we prioritize external validation over our own authenticity and wellbeing, it can create a significant emotional burden. One of the main problems with caring excessively is that it can lead to a lack of self-confidence. Our value becomes contingent on the opinions of others. This can create a cycle of anxiety and fears about not meeting other’s expectations.
This kind of worry limits our ability to express our self authentically. We may find ourselves conforming to societal norms or the expectations of others, rather than expressing our true feelings, thoughts, and desires. This can stifle creativity, and the ability to pursue our genuine passions.
Worrying what others think and needing external validation can lead to emotional exhaustion. It can be draining, both mentally and emotionally. It can use up a lot of mental energy and result in a constant state of apprehension about how we are perceived by others.
On a deeper level, excessive concern about others’ opinions can hinder our personal growth and fulfillment. It can prevent us from embracing our individuality, taking risks, or pursuing our goals. This can cause us to miss out on opportunities for self-discovery and meaningful connections.
The way to address this tendency to care to much what others think is to cultivate self-awareness. By tuning in to our own values, aspirations, and strengths we can develop a stronger sense of self-assurance and reduce the influence of external opinions.
Practicing self-compassion is also important. Learning to treat ourselves with kindness and understanding, especially in the face of disapproval and criticism can build more resilience and a more balanced perspective of external judgments.
Another essential strategy is to set healthy boundaries. Recognizing what matters most to us and aligning our actions with our values can reduce the impact of the opinions of others. Seeking out supportive and accepting people can provide a valuable framework leading to a healthier approach to social validation.
Freeing ourselves from the excessive concern about the opinions of others allows us to embrace our individuality, pursue our aspirations with confidence, and develop more genuine and fulfilling relationships. It is realizing that our worth is not determined by the opinions of others, but by our own self-perception and authenticity.
Remember, you are the only one just like you that has ever walked this earth, and there will never be another just like you. Developing your own consciousness is important, as we are all part of the human family. It is more challenging in the age of social media, fake news and conspiracy theories, but also more important than ever.
We each have the ability to grow in wisdom. When you find your own true, wise voice, do not be afraid to use it.
Gwen Randall-Young is an author and award-winning psychologist. For permission to reprint this article, or to obtain books, CDs or MP3s, visit www.gwen.ca. Follow Gwen on Facebook for inspiration.
