Psychology for Living: Worry vs. Contentment

Gwen Randall-Young

Worry is like a rocking chair; it gives you something to do but doesn’t get you anywhere.” ~ Glenn Turner

Most people worry some of the time. Some people worry most of the time. A little bit of worry now and again is normal, but constant worrying is not. The minds of worriers seem to be able to manufacture an infinite number of things to focus upon.

Some suffer from anxiety, and the anxiety causes them to over-worry. It can become disabling. Therapy can be helpful, and sometimes medication brings relief. For others, worry is a habit. It is a tendency to focus on the negative, and then to dwell on it. The worrier can create a whole list of “what if?” scenarios.

The worrier may think he or she is doing something constructive by being alert to all that could go wrong, but unless some positive, preventative action is taken, the worry accomplishes nothing besides creating anxiety and distress.

Some worry too much about other people, spending time criticizing the actions or beliefs of others. They may get some satisfaction in feeling they are somehow better than those they are judging, but in the long run this does not bring peace or happiness.

It is really not so much anything going on outside of us that determines how we feel in life, but rather it is the environment we create within our own hearts and minds. If we want to be content, we can increase our chances of creating that by taking a few simple steps: 1) Banish negative thinking. If you catch yourself having negative thoughts, stop immediately and think of positive things. 2) If a worry comes up, ask yourself if it is realistic to worry about this, if there is positive action you can take, and if it is, in fact, any of your business! 3) Adopt a live-and-let live attitude to others. We are all on our own journey and are at different places in our evolution. Sure, there will be those who are less evolved that we are, but there will also be those who are wiser and more effective than we are. Keep your focus on how you are doing, and how you can live from your highest self.

Remember too, that most of what we worry about never happens. Immerse yourself in things you love and that bring you joy and celebrate the good things in your life. No matter what happens, we always have a choice about how to think about it. If we can’t change it or find anything positive in it, then we just have to let it go.

Gwen Randall-Young is an author and award-winning psychologist. For permission to reprint this article, or to obtain books, CDs or MP3s, visit www.gwen.ca. Follow Gwen on Facebook for inspiration. 

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